Scott: I don’t want to show you what I want to buy from REI because I’m embarrassed. Me: Um, okay, but we are walking into REI together so you’re probably not buying it today. Anyway, we need to find shoelaces for your broken one. Scott: Well, we should’ve looked for shoelaces at the other store. [...]
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My husband says: No more candy, E. My 5-year-old responds: I’m going to call 9-1-1 and have you arrested. The call would go something like this: Officer, I would like to report an emergency. I did not get a lollipop when I asked {at 7 a.m.} I did not get 5 juice boxes today {or any [...]
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My daughter: Oh no. The tree broke! My son: Don’t worry, N. It’s okay. God takes care of all the broken things. These moments fill my heart with assurance that God is as much an experience as an idea to be discussed, but I have rested too long on those alone. When we left our [...]
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I saw some tweets about Draw Something, and I immediately knew it was an app I must ignore if I wanted to have a life. Five minutes after making that decision, I downloaded it and emailed my sister so I had someone to play against who would be as swayed by make up words like app and [...]
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The kids and I have our priorities straight, but we’re nervous Scott might forget the household necessities when he goes grocery shopping tonight. Why yes, dinner will be delicious this week. PS. Scott does the grocery shopping now, but spare me the husband accolades because it’s not just a wife’s job and he deserves pats [...]
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I took the worst picture of me while taking my I fight with everyone photo collage. I kept laughed out loud each time I looked at it while simultaneously thinking: No one should ever see this photography since I’ve already been informed I should change my avatar to look beautiful rather than vaguely bored. But Scott [...]
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My Valentine’s Day was going along swimmingly until I walked into my home and it was smokey. I was in such a good mood that I didn’t immediately think HOLY CRAP HOUSE IS BURNING DOWN and instead, thought that Scott was making me a cake, and it wasn’t going so well. I guess burning cakes [...]
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Monday night, I posted on my Facebook page mostly because Scott said it, and I laughed. Then Scott leapt in the air and called himself my muse. But that wasn’t the stupid part. As we cleaned up dinner, I asked: Why are you still wearing your shoes? You’ve been home for an hour. Scott looked [...]
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