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Neighbors

What a National Lazy Day looks like.

I like to start stuff. Not just fights. In December, I declared a National Coffee Day. IVs in by 8 a.m. and don’t stop until the shakes. I declared National Sweatpants Day in January. Then I got multiple tweets asking if yoga pants counted. I deliberated with my team of crackin’ marketers, also known as [...]

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We’ve been living in this house for two years. Our neighbors may still ask if we’re new to the neighborhood, but one person knows EXACTLY how long we’ve been here. Our postman. After one year, the post office will no longer forward mail to the previous owner. So wintertime last year, my mailbox began to [...]

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I'm also crying.

My mother-in-law’s dog, Misha, is staying with us for the week. He came with a set of instructions like She’s not really on a schedule and She is totally crate-trained. We were given further instruction by unnamed sources on things like the MIL/Misha version of crate-training involves building a sound-proof bunker. And living in it. [...]

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Dog poop bags

When we had Ratchet dog (who has been re-adopted! yay!), we bought biodegradable doggy crap bags. Luckily, they came with directions broken down into six easy-to-follow steps because “steward of the environment” might also mean “moron”. Our neighbors*, finding our love of the environment repugnant, since global warming is just a natural course of events [...]

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What should we name him? Also, who's good at stealing things?

I have a tumblr account that I used to post funny stuff that was too short or random for here. Then realized that y’all are TOTALLY too short and random. Also, I have a WTH category for just such a decision. So welcome to the first (or second) edition of WTH World. Why Are You [...]

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Our Rainbow Flag

As some of you know, we bought our rainbow flag in a show of support for our gay youth. We finally overcome our personal inertia and display it on our newly-installed flagpole after a homophobic comment at a neighborhood Halloween party about Scott not wanting to be a “bowl of fruit.” When Scott proudly tells [...]

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Before you run to the comments, you should know that Halloween is a time-honored tradition in our home. I only missed one year of dressing up in the last thirty-two, and it was the year we gave out so much candy I had to make a second trip to CVS. (Because what is Halloween without [...]

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I have four hundred of these.

Happy Columbus Day! I am a lot like our adventurous friend! We are both Italian. Well, I have an Italian grandfather. Who I used to tell my friends was in the mafia. Because otherwise he was just some old guy with an accent. Anyway, Chris and I both like to travel. We don’t like other [...]

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