my poor foot

Pass The Embarrassing Injury Award To Me

I bruised a bunch of bones and sprained in my foot by running as fast as I could after my dog who had a teapot in his mouth and basically punching the wooden leg of my couch with my left foot. Oh and I was laughing hysterically at the time until I hit the couch and floor, of course.

my poor foot
I’m in the boot for at least a week.
couch leg
Although now that I’ve taken a closer look, how could that couch leg have caused so much damage? All I know is I went from chasing him to on the ground in terrible pain after something came in contact with my left foot. Maybe the mysterious white thing in the photo knows.

I can’t decide if my life lesson is Never play tag with my dog or Definitely increase your awesome sock collection. Either way, I’m already bored with elevating my foot.

Puppy hood
I made puppy ears! My daughter didn’t want to wear a headband for her Lars puppy costume so I attached them to a jacket hood. It’s like she knew people only appreciate DIY Halloween costumes and didn’t want me to fail as a person.

PS. I once herniated a disc my back making out with Scott. Maybe it’s an every decade debacle of embarrassing injuries for me? I wonder who wins the years in between mine…

PPS. My sister asked me if I fell into Lars’ hole. Now that would’ve been a lesson from the universe.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

8 thoughts to “Pass The Embarrassing Injury Award To Me”

  1. You seriously crack me up woman!!! I hope the costume turns out. I am sure it will. I also think that is why the universe makes super cute kids because they are the only one who think and can make our stuff look cute. Feel better and follow doctors orders!!!!! XOXXO

  2. I’m pretty sure the puppy ears make up for any bad week that could be had.

    One time I tripped over nothing, fell in the hallway, and broke my wrist. I also sneezed one morning a couple of years ago, and threw my back out for over a week. Apparently I have super power sneezes, but they only work against me. I am my own nemesis.

    Hope your foot gets better quickly!

  3. Ah, tag with a dog is how I broke my collar bone. Dangerous stuff.

    In an unrelated topic, that may possibly brighten some of that foot elevation time, I just read an article about fart-smell-blocking undies. Go search and laugh.

  4. To Make You Feel Better/Lucky: A few years back my sister-in-law tripped over/kicked a case of water bottles that were left on the floor. She snapped off her pinky toe at the Proximinal Phalanges. Her x-ray showed it free floating and about a 30 degree angle. OUCH.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.