I climbed up the bunk beds this weekend to go to the doctor’s office where I was well taken care of by Princess N and Nugget Hamburger.
However, my doctor visits didn’t end this weekend. I went to the urologist on Tuesday because I have kidney stones. Maybe.
Background: I told Facebook on the 28th: “My stomach hurt so much this morning that I couldn’t walk for 45 minutes. I was literally sitting or crawling until I took a hot bath. WTH is happening to me? And the first person to answer “cancer” is fired.”
Y’all were so nice to me in the comments and made me feel normal enough to actually take care of it. I guess I thought I would show up with weird pain and the doctor would say: TOO WEIRD! GO HOME! (And to think I was once surprised by the patient who peed blood for 10 years before seeing a doctor about it.) Without friends to say, Hey, that happened to me. or Hey, let’s get that checked out NOW., it’s easier to pretend it will go away and never come back.
Anyway, my PCP thought it was my gallbladder but did a full abdominal ultrasound just in case. My gall bladder look fantastic but the ultrasound showed kidney stones.
On Tuesday December 4, me, thirty-five old men and three young men went to the urologist. He was very nice even when I hid my cup of pee behind the extra rolls of toilet paper because I was worried someone would steal it. (I had to pee earlier than my appointment time so there were going to be many other pee-ers between me and my nurse taking my sample and I thought leaving a big cup of ALEX IWASHYNA pee on display was much stranger than hiding it behind the extra toilet paper. Potato. Potato.)
My urologist said my ultrasound imaging of the kidney weren’t good. In fact, they didn’t even get the left kidney (?) and although he did see the two “what-they-think-are-stones” stones, he felt the right kidney images weren’t great either. Also, although he has seen kidney stones present with severe upper abdominal pain and some back pain, he felt like my presentation was atypical enough that we had to keep considering other possibilities.
Blah blah blah…. I’m having a full abdominal and pelvic CT scan on Friday possibly with contrast. The point of exposing me to radiation is to visualize my kidneys better if it is stones and to rule out most other abdominal or pelvic issues.
I know it’s the right thing to do, but I wish we already had an answer. I also can’t help the deep down fear the CT scan will find something terrible so feel free to think kidney stone thoughts because I’d rather have those than where my stupid medical experiences go. Too bad cat scans don’t include cats because that would be very soothing.