TheBaneOfMyExistence

Meet My Nemesis: Pink Kitty

Meet the bane of my existence and my daughter’s favorite toy: PINK KITTY

TheBaneOfMyExistence
Pink. Tiny. Evil.

Because it is tiny and favored and hates my happiness, Pink Kitty is lost several times a day.

In the morning, I am greeted by: Mama, where’s pink kitty?

The rest of my day is filled with variations: Mama, why haven’t you found pink kitty? Mama, I looked everywhere for pink kitty and she’s gooooonnnnnneeeee. Mama, is pink kitty okay? I haven’t seen her in DAAAYYYYYSSSSS. Mama, will you look again for pink kitty? Mama, I can’t sleep without pink kitty.

I have finally met a cat I hate. She does not come when called. She does not meow when lost. My daughter doesn’t mean to lose her, but Pink kitty is wily and mean and fits in seat cushions, pillow cases and random kitschy boxes that I’ve never opened until Pink Kitty appeared. In fact, I cannot think of a place I have NOT found Pink Kitty.

PinkKittyHiding

She is second only to my daughter’s blanket, which makes her more important than me. Perhaps it is because Pink Kitty ambled onto the scene as we were beginning the anti-paci crusade. I HAVE NO ENERGY TO FIGHT THE KITTY AFTER WORLD WAR PACIFIER. And it knew it.

I know. I know. Buy some backups. Maybe 6 or 10 or 1500. Well, in order to buy backup Pink Kitty, I have to purchase a $12 Twilight Sparkle on a Scooter set. Yes, this My Little Pony brought a My Little Nemesis.

photo: amazon

Perhaps, I could justify one more set. Isn’t my sanity worth it? But then I stumble over Twilight Sparkle’s scooter helmet at the bottom of the stairs FOR THE LAST WEEK because my daughter does not care about her scooter-ing ability. She can break her brain all she wants as long as Pink Kitty is safe and sound.

I would be purchasing a plastic pink kitty smaller than my pinkie finger for $12 and every morning I would be greeted with my daughter’s sad eyes: Mama, where are my pink kitty sisters? They are missing.

twopinkkitties
Forget it. Two sneaky bastards are not coming into my home.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on LateEnough.com, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

30 thoughts to “Meet My Nemesis: Pink Kitty”

  1. goddamn that thing is tiny. owen is one of those kids, the kind who has an object that has to be accounted for every minute of every day, but for years it was a spatula, and as long as it had the right kind of silicone spatula-piece, it was ok, which meant i could buy several interchangeable ones and the extras that he wasn’t clutching in his right hand and talking to 24/7 could be used in my kitchen. now it’s a pointer (a foot-long plastic stick with a plastic, pointing hand at the end), so we only have one, but it’s fairly easy to keep track of. not that i wouldn’t be able to put owen through trade school if i had a nickel for every minute i’ve spent looking for the GD thing. but that kitty…..the only way you hang onto a thing that tiny for any extended period of time is if mama hates it. because then you have to.

  2. Oh I’m familiar with pink kitty. And her cohorts, Baby Turtle, Puppy, and Other Pink Kitty. Luckily my girls often move on to something else. They’ve learned they “it’ll turn up. It always does…” Maybe I wouldn’t have to teach them that if ee didn’t lose everything ALL THE TIME.

  3. WHY do they become attached to tiny little things? For a while A was OBSESSED with a tiny ladybug that “coincidentally” came with a My Little Pony! MLP is obviously adding something addictive to the plastic making up the little pony sidekicks.

  4. You know, I was just looking at these in Target and felt mass anxiety bubbling up. Also, the new fashioned My Little Ponies are sluts. They remind me of the Kardashians.

  5. I’m trying not to be charmed by Pink Kitty’s adorableness, in order to be indignant and annoyed along with you. But it’s not working. Cuz Mama…Pink Kitty is SOOOO DAAAARN CUUUUTE! 😉

  6. Oh, I have Pink Kitty’s friend White Kitty!! (Came with the Applejack playset)

    Thankfully White Kitty is not as important to my kid as Pink Kitty is to yours 🙂

  7. My kids love those small little toys too and insist on taking them every where we go and that means that at bed time when they need those things to sleep… I hunting all over God’s green earth for them.

  8. I think I would tie a long ribbon around Kitties neck and attach a bunch of balloons…haha! My daughter has a plastic zebra that our dog also claims as her BFF. They fight over who gets to sleep with it. There are tug of wars and zebra hidings also.

  9. This is the exact reason why I refuse to buy Riley (or even let him buy) that darn Squinkie things! Not only are they simple hors devours for Samspon, but there is no way they’d last longer than 2 days before they were lost for good.

  10. No tiny pink kitties at our house. I think that CMH mostly just likes to have MANY special things. “Mommy, where is ______?”. You can insert Baby Cinderella, Minnie Mouse underwear, my favorite purple cup, my GIANT purple ball…..any of these will be asked. Thank goodness she doesn’t have ONE thing she wants me to keep track of every minute of every day.

    It is hard enough to keep track of her and her brother. SIGH.

  11. AS soon as you have 12 pink kitties, one in every purse and pocket, prepared for the next “Where’s pink kitty?”… she will no longer want pink kitty. I know this because I have 5 tiny gumball-toy-sized madagascar penguins (purchased via ebay) – and NOW no one wants them.

  12. Whatever you do…DO NOT BUY ANOTHER PINK KITTY!!! I repeat…DO NOT BUY ANOTHER PINK KITTY!

    Oh it seems like a grand idea until it’s 11pm and N won’t go to bed because you can’t find BOTH pink kitties. I lived this with a stuffed Meeko and trust me when I tell you the phase will pass a lot faster with one.

    I would suggest buying a larger stuffed version and telling her that it magically “grew” or something…it’s just much easier to find. Then tuck the smaller one in a keepsake box where she won’t see it until she’s packing for college and will find this story incredibly sentimental and you’ll both get a good cry out of her childhood memories.

    Hugs!

      1. Glad it made YOU laugh!

        I still have lingering PTSD from being 9 months pregnant with B and D is screaming Two meekos mommy! TWO MEEKOS MOMMY!

        Praise liberal Jesus D turns 18 this coming Monday! Whew!

    1. Double-comment deleted. And you are so right about buying 12 — my kids do that with their “favorite” food, too. It’s like I have SUCKER written on my forehead in kid ink.

  13. seeeeriously. why do kids pick the weirdest most tiniest things EVER to be their true loves?

    sigh.

    i am frequently on the hunt for a very particular matchbox car that may or may not be a figment of his imagination that we even own such car.

    1. Oh! Even with all of these horror stories I am seriously considering buying this set! I didn’t know it existed… My daughter (turning 3) is OBSESSED with tapirs, she asked for a tapir birthday party. (which, believe it or not, is pretty much impossible, unless you live in south America, the party city’s up here aren’t getting many request for tapir parties I guess) So, since I clearly want to make my life as hard as possible, I will order a tiny tapir that I will spend the rest of my life looking for! Man, being a parent has really brought out the masochist in me.

      1. Christi, if I could hug and make you feel better about the tapir obsession, I would. I would tell you that this too shall pass and you and your daughter will look back on the tapir obsession with laughter, but until then, you will want to bang your head against a wall for you child’s unusual obsession with an animal I didn’t even know existed until she told me about it.

        My girl was around 3 when the obsession began, too, and last for a good year- a fairly long time for that age. I highly recommend shopping now for anything tapir related for Christmas. Santa brings one special present to my kids. They make that present count, too. One year, she decided that she wanted a tapir stuffie. Well, heck, where was I going to find that? Thankfully, someone out there thought that a Beanie Baby tapir holding a Coke bottle was essential and thus, “Baby Tapir” joined our family. He still graces our home, absolutely filthy, but full of fond memories.

        Whew, this is getting long! 🙂 This one’s cute- we went to the Minnesota zoo during the tapir obsession and low and behold, the have tapirs there. We the girl on video with them and she could even make their squeak absolutely perfect. I kid you not, it talked BACK to her. Obsessive Girl talked to her little pal. Only my kid.

  14. So what if you have a craft day, and since you’re admittedly bad at crafts, you could “accidentally” glue Pink Kitty to something really large. Also love the idea about Pink Kitty growing into a bigger stuffed animal.

    We have this problem with cars and trains that Dean MUST HAVE, especially when I’m cooking and am in danger of burning our entire dinner if I actually stop to help him look for them. But the whining and his total inability to look for things by himself does make it hard to deal with!

    There’s always RFID tagging…

  15. But…but…Twilight Sparkle doesn’t even have a kitty! She should have a dragon, or an owl, or a Smarty Pants doll! And she has no athletic ability, why is she riding a scooter? Have these toy makers never seen the show?

    See, I have brain space to think about these things, because my son is not old enough to have developed bizarre attachments yet. But he does demand we watch at least 2-3 episodes of My Little Pony daily.

    1. Exactly! I thought it came with the Rainbow Dash set because at least she’d be scooting around some — it’s like the evil kitty infiltrated the set. I though pinky kitty was in a basket but when I looked closer, the cat is attached to a book. My cats have NEVER done that.

  16. Little Pets “Snake” was my arch enemy (couldn’t spell nemesis). Even before it was in our house. Searched seven WalMarts and four Targets in two states for naught. Older brother used his secret Japanese toy websites to find one. I have film of her literally frothing at the mouth when she opened her Christmas present. Oh the good old days. Now at the cusp of teenagerhood she has her own gift card at Claire’s.

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