TerriblePackingList

My Top 7 Awkward Moments Around #BlogHer12

I can’t do a coherent conference recap because I’m exhausted so I will just give the hilarious highlights and move on.

1) When I got home, I found my pre-BlogHer packing list, which made me surprised I even had underwear at BlogHer.

TerriblePackingList

2) A pre-BlogHer texting conversation that opens up with a big fear of mine and ends with me being NOT COMFORTED AT ALL by Jessica (FourPlusAnAngel).

NotComfortingText

Aside: I’m the blue bubbles, and I have a thing about disappointing people in person because I often write humor and think people except me to be hilarious in person. I can be a little funny, and if I’m very comfortable or on a roll, a lot funny, but mostly? I WRITE FUNNY, which meant, of course, I couldn’t resist asking Jenni (MommyNaniBooBoo) on the last day of the conference…

3) The possibility of a deep and meaningful conversation about how we felt about BlogHer as it came to a close was within reach with Jenni and I.

Jenni: A lot of people aren’t what I expected because I have a very active imagination.
Me: Really? What did you expect of me? {because who cares about other people}
Jenni: Well, I thought you’d be taller… and quieter.

Before I could take TALKING TOO MUCH personally, I remembered 48 hours early, when I met Jenni for the first time and yelled: You’re so tall! {small pause while I digest the oddest of that hello} IT’S WONDERFUL! Let’s hold hands!

We worked through it though.

AlexBeingAwesomewithJenni

4) In between those awkward moments, I ran into @TheNextMartha.

In the middle of our conversation, she says: See? You aren’t awkward.
Me: Or maybe you’re a little awkward and we…
Jen {interrupting}: I never said I was awkward.
Me: TA-DA! {jazz hands}

And the rest happened in the elevator where I COULD NOT ESCAPE:

5) I got made fun of for being a blogger by PEOPLE ATTENDING A SHOE CONFERENCE at the same hotel. Their biggest HAHA was about swag, but if shoes conferences don’t have swag, I’d be bitter, too, so I almost gave them 1 of my 11 new screen cleaner cloths.

6) I was asked what the difference between blogging and Facebook is by a 90-year-old women, whose 90-year-old husband said: A blog is where she can say whatever she wants. It’s like he already defriended me on Facebook and just reads Late Enough now.

7) I caught 3 bloggers riding the elevator. Seriously, the door opened and 1 blogger got out. I got on with the 3 leftover bloggers and noticed no other floor buttons were lit. I pushed the floor 19 button, and we went up. I got off and they stayed on WITH NO FLOOR BUTTONS PUSHED. They were either really lost or really drunk, and if anyone complains about the size of their hotel room or the party rooms, ask if they were maybe staying in the elevator.

Well, that’s all I can think of off the top of my tired brain. The rest of my photos are up on Facebook and the rest of my awkward moments are sure to be etched in people’s minds FOREVER. Or for 5 WHOLE MINUTES.

PS. We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled, non-BlogHer ’12 programing, Tuesday. Same Late Enough time. Same Late Enough blog.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on LateEnough.com, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

33 thoughts to “My Top 7 Awkward Moments Around #BlogHer12”

  1. I tried to be funny after I used the converted men’s room. I couldn’t find any paper towels, but there were black curtains on one wall. I tiptoed over and started to dry my hands. A urinal behind the curtain flushed loudly. I screamed. Then I laughed and looked at the women staring at me and said, “Remember that time the urinal made me scream?!”

    Crickets.

  2. I so missed out. Last year when BlogHer was in San Diego (nothing but a bike ride down the road) I didn’t go because I was snobbing (or trying to snob) blogging in general. And this year, if it HAD been in my home town I so… bleh.

    It looks like the Queen of Awkward had a blast and I am so jealous!

  3. I found you friendly, open, and a perfect example of how to be at a large conference where so many want to meet you.

    I caught you at lunch and you took the time to talk to me, even though you had a table to go to and food to eat. Thereby teaching me a lesson that all it takes is 5 mins of undivided attention in order for people to feel noticed.

    No, you are not socially awkward at all. Not even a bit.
    I will email you my verbal faux pas. It was bad.

    xo

    LOVELY to meet you.

    And I love Jenni. A lot. Why I always snag her for my roomie. We got this understanding…xo

  4. You did not disappoint in person. Though I did expect you to be more stalkable. So maybe you did… Hmmmm. Nope, I’ve decided, you didn’t. You were awesome. Though, admittedly, not nearly as tall as my imaginary 6’1 version of you.

  5. The Next Martha is freakin hilarious!

    Also… the elevator events are… interesting to say the least! I’d be interested in why they just stayed on the elevator. I bet one of them blogs about it!

    1. I had to remember to bring myself! Wait, what? It’s actually a MiFi. I have a personal hotspot so I can write/blog/work outside of the house even when there isn’t free wifi. (personal hotspot still sounds kinda dirty)

  6. Sounds like you had fun – glad to see TheNextMartha brought out your A-game. She does that with me too. In the best way.

    I’m not helping myself here, am I?

  7. I’m desperate to attend Blogher 2013, based solely on your adventures there last weekend. Bank robberies are already being planned to fund the trip.

  8. Number one: I feel awkward because I never imagined how tall you were before we met.

    Number two: I am jealous you have fun glowy necklace pics. Maybe I should invite you over and we can have a rave for the kids?

    Number three: Good job on helping Jen feel like she is one of us. I mean, who doesn’t want to be extra awkward?

  9. So funny! I love how the old guy explained the difference between facebook and blogging. I’m not sure I could have done a better job. Also, how awesome would shoe swag be?

    I love the pictures of you and Jenni. That looks like SO MUCH FUN!

  10. So happy to be among your awkward moments because it just confirms that we are meant to be awkward friends for life. Can’t even tell you how much I appreciate you.

  11. It’s true – I have an active imagination. No one was wearing the capes they have in my mind…
    Also, I imagine everyone tall.
    You were one of the highlights of my trip. Please come over to my house so we can talk some more…
    and take more pictures.

  12. WOW! What a wonderful, funny, filled with misspellings post from the Heart. You even gave me a flashback to a Ninth Grade Church convention at the International Hotel in Los Angeles (yes, the RFK hotel). The elevator was such a make out spot a love seat, end table and lamp were snuck into it.

    Since I come from a family of shoemakers I apologize for the entire industry. Dorks.
    Wait a minute…did I just read that vibrators were handed out at Blogher? Did they have the Blogher logo on it? Could you get them with your own blog on it? Wow. A LateEnough vibrator would take things to a whole new level of awkwardness.

    No wonder guys don’t go to Blogher. What would we hand out at BlogHim conventions? Condoms? Boxes of tissues? Awkward…..

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