I Love My Crazy Family

We herd our children to the dining room table to eat a delicious meal of steamed-in-a-bag edamame and boil-for-seven-minutes tortellini as a family. My son takes one bite and asks to leave.

He hasn’t even sat down in his chair yet.

Me: Sit down please and eat.

E sits then jumps up.

Me: Sit down now please.

E: But I have to pee!

My sternness is often foiled by the bladder.

Me: Fine, go and come back please.

Two minutes later there’s a commotion to my left, and I am greeted by a completely naked boy (because pulling up pants post-pee is EXHAUSTING) who is climbing the wall.


Scott and I are quite impressed, which completely backfires because my kids come from a long line of I CAN DO THAT TOO, LOOK AT ME!, and LET’S ALL DO SOMETHING WEIRD.

Without anyone saying a word, my family begins to congregate in the door frame.

My daughter peed before dinner, which y’all already knew because she’s pant-less as well.

And yes, N pulled her chair over to the wall instead of climbing it, and she was no less proud. NOR WAS I.

I love my crazy family even when the climbing of the walls is more figurative.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

24 thoughts to “I Love My Crazy Family”

  1. My first thought when seeing the first picture – “Oo, he can hurt his peepee doing that!!!”
    While my girls do like to keep their pants on, they have done the very same thing in my house. And yes, I was also impressed!

  2. Again, I must implore Scott to do a guest post in which he instructs other bloggers’ husbands to participate in the creation of the blog with the same panache and enthusiasm that he does.

    Does he have any advice on how to entice the spouse of a blogger to be photographed in compromising positions (other than blackmail or bribery?)

  3. Despite me wearing one on our second date, I was really hoping I could get a few “too much” bubbles to hide the sleeveless t-shirt. Or maybe a “see Walt, we support GUNS at home”

  4. Crap. Now I am going to have to go climb a wall just to see if I can do it. How awesome would it be if your family started a new Olympic event? Seriously, that takes some muscle. I am amazed by your sons strength! I can’t even do a pull up.

  5. That was so hilarious and unexpected! I believe today my medicine for my hope gone bad is laughter! Lots and lots of it! I have been visiting my blog borg, reading all the recounts from the BlogHer weekend, etc. and just cracking up! I wish I didn’t have to work so hard at being funny!

  6. Ooh good, the kids have discovered indoor climbing. The next stage is outside and TREES. You have an upstairs. There may be an intermediary stage you can enjoy as well.

  7. Pants have been overrated here, too..and our AC has been on:)

    Love that your hubby went ahead and joined in and you documented it!

    My kids also have an aversion to sitting at the table at dinner without eleventy billion reminders!

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