I Hate The Entrepreneurial Spirit And Fabric Belts

Scott: I don’t want to show you what I want to buy from REI because I’m embarrassed.

Me: Um, okay, but we are walking into REI together so you’re probably not buying it today. Anyway, we need to find shoelaces for your broken one.

Scott: Well, we should’ve looked for shoelaces at the other store.

Me: No, I think REI is a good shoelace place.

Scott: No, I’m going to look online.

Me: What are you going to look for? Shoelacesforeveryone dot com?

Scott: Yeah I am. What? You don’t think that exists on the Internet?

Me: No, I’m sure they do, and their website probably does better than mine. I hate them and their entrepreneurial spirit. I’m buying the shoelaces here to spite them.

Scott: Well, this is what I want to buy from REI that I didn’t want you to know.

Fabric Belts

Me: Yup, you were totally right. You should be embarrassed. That’s a fabric belt.

Scott: When belts come in unisex, you know they’re hip.

Me: Shoelaces are unisex.

Scott: I like this one. Wait, that’s a woman’s belt. Why is that a woman’s belt?

Me: I’ll assume you’re talking to yourself now. Smile for camera!

People of REI

PS. SHOCKINGLY, is available to all my entrepreneurial readers. Although I might just buy it and redirected it to I cannot WAIT to be rich. Or be very disappointing to someone with a broken shoelace stuck with a photography of my husband wearing a fabric belt.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

6 thoughts to “I Hate The Entrepreneurial Spirit And Fabric Belts”

  1. Oh, the people of REI picture is priceless!
    And my husband hides his purchases in online shopping when embarrassed as well. what’s up with that?

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