My Chocolate is Gross Face photo

What Is Thicker Than Blood?

Me to my toddler daughter: WHOA! What happened? Are you hurt?

My daughter steps closer and so does my freaking out.

Me: WHAT HAPPENED!?!?! You’re bleeding! OMG, are you bleeding?

I reach out to touch her forehead as she stares at me.

Me: Blood? Holy crap! Are you okay? ARE YOU OKAY? YOU’RE IN SHOCK!

I rub my finger and thumb together. Slightly confused at her lack of crying but fairly convinced we’re in SILENT CRY BUILDUP mode, I do the ultimate test.

Me: Oh wait, it’s just chocolate.

Gross.

The chocolate taste in my mouth that is.

My Chocolate is Gross Face photo
My Chocolate is Gross face. (except white chocolate mostly because it doesn't look like blood)

PS. I am making some changes on my site to increase it’s speed because 97% of websites were faster than mine. (oops.) Part of the process is disabling some of my plugins including my mobile plugin. If you access my site on your phone or iPad or another mobile device, and you’re having problems with reading and accessibility, please let me know. Also, if you notice any of the other changes and think, WHERE IS ____? I MISS IT!, email me alex{at}lateenough{dot}com. I want to my site to be convenient and snuggly, not just fast.

PPS. Over in the sidebar towards the bottom is Google Friend Connect (GFC). If you use GFC to follow this blog, please switch to my RSS feed, ‘new post’ daily email or my weekly newsletter. Google is disabling the feature in a few months for any blogs outside of Blogger, and I don’t want to miss you.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on LateEnough.com, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

18 thoughts on “What Is Thicker Than Blood?

  1. oh my god.

    you mean it’s not my computer??

    I guess that ‘s good for me.

    My computer always freezes up on your site, so I try to visit you in bunches, and read a lot of your posts at once….instead of freezing up every day.

    How did you find out?

    Maybe my blog freezes up, too?

    1. Has the freezing your computer gotten better over the last week or so? What browser do you use?

      I knew it was slow just from clicking on it myself. Once a week my server would get overwhelmed as well. I found out the specific stat of 97% through Alex.com. Categorizes the speed of a website is and mine just kept getting slower. (94% to 97%)

      I haven’t invested a lot of money (just time) into my blog so I decided that I would for this because my own remedies weren’t enough. A speaker and friend, at a local conference that I was on a panel for, talked about website speed so I hired him.

  2. I have to echo Alexandra….how did you find that out? Because now I’m wondering if mine is slow too.

    One day I found chocolate mysteriously on my foot and it took several hours to figure out where it came from (I’m not THAT bad of a housekeeper, I promise!). My daughter sneaked a chocolate chip filled granola bar and dropped some crumbs near my computer chair.

    1. I knew it was slow just from clicking on it myself. Once a week my server would get overwhelmed as well even after I switched to a VPS.

      I found out the specific stat of 97% through Alex.com. Categorizes the speed of a website is and mine just kept getting slower. (94% to 97%)

      I haven’t invested a lot of money (just time) into my blog so I decided that I would for this because my own remedies weren’t enough and it was annoying for readers and google penalizes you as well.

      A speaker and friend, at a local conference that I was on a panel for, talked about website speed so I hired him.

      Have you noticed a difference at all?

  3. Look, if we’re being honest, blood does not taste that bad. A little metallic perhaps but it’s not like it’s sauerkraut or something.

    Although I did get bitten by something unidentified on Halloween, so I suppose we should take that into consideration.

  4. Sigh. Chocolate is my drug of choice. There are days when I could probably convince you to just shoot it straight into my veins. I CRAVE it. LOL

  5. I’ve never been able to access your site on my iPod touch, which is mostly why I don’t comment very much. I always figured it was because I needed to upgrade, and your site was too awesome for my outdated technological devices.

    1. My site is laughing at your outdated iPod. Bwahahaha.

      Actually, do you mind trying on your iPod Touch again since I’ve made these changes and let me know if you can access it now? Maybe it was me all along.

  6. weird. I never had problems getting to your site.

    I am crabby about GFC. Stupid google trying to conquer the world but having a crappy blogging platform.

    and I don’t USUALLY crave/like chocolate too much, but this pregnancy has made me all chocolatey craving. weird.

  7. OMG, that was kinda scary! Also what kind of chocolate looks like blood.P.S. Try snickers or butter fingers I used to hate chocolate but those candies changed my mind.

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