Sometimes

Sometimes I can’t shake the uneasiness. Sometimes I create the uneasiness.

Sometimes I need someone to the laugh when I hurl curses. Sometimes I need someone to tell me it’s not appropriate to talk to someone that way.

Sometimes I need a friend to call back. Sometimes I need a friend to answer the phone. Sometimes I need to answer my own phone.

Sometimes I don’t understand. Sometimes I don’t want to understand. Sometimes I’m not understood.

Sometimes I need to rant and rave even though I’m just being humored. Sometimes I change someone’s perspective. Sometimes someone changes mine.

Sometimes I need to tell jokes. Sometimes I need to cry my eyes out.

Sometimes I know everything is coming up Alex. Sometimes I know everything is wrong and I suck.

Sometimes I live in the past. Sometimes I make up the future. Sometimes I stay in my present.

Sometimes I don’t think that I deserve love. Sometimes I demand more than my fair share.

Sometimes I’m a friend. Sometimes I’m a nemesis. Sometimes it’s all in my head.

Sometimes I’m present and accounted for. Sometimes I’m hiding in the bathroom.

Sometimes I need to mind my own business. Sometimes I need to I speak up. Sometimes I avoid speaking up by pretending to mind my own business.

Sometimes I smile so big it hurts. Sometimes I laugh because I hurt. Sometimes I laugh to hurt others.

Sometimes I’m completely myself. Sometimes I try to be like you. Sometimes I wish you were more like me.

Sometimes I appreciate my family, friends, readers and kind strangers, for not only loving me sometimes.

Sometimes I remember to say thank you.

Alex Iwashyna

Alex Iwashyna went from a B.A. in philosophy to an M.D. to a SAHM, poet and writer by 30. She spends most of her writing time on LateEnough.com, a humor blog (except when it's serious) about her husband fighting zombies, awkward attempts at friendship, and dancing like everyone is watching. She also has a soft spot for culture, politics, and rude Southern people who offend her Yankee sensibilities. She parents 2 elementary-aged children, 1 foster baby, 3 cats, and 1 puppy, who are all Southern but not rude. Yet.

38 thoughts to “Sometimes”

  1. Oh, aren’t we all sometimes this, sometimes that? Sometimes I’m a raving lunatic and sometimes people tell me I’m the most grounded person they know. Obviously they haven’t seen the raving lunatic side…..

    1. We are. But sometimes I forget. The comments with additionally ‘sometimes’ like yours? Surprised me at first. And then made me unbelievably happy.
      Humanity. So annoying and awesome at the same time.

      Ps. Raving lunatics are my favorite people

  2. I love this. Because I can relate to all of your sometimes.

    This one “Sometimes I don’t think that I deserve love. Sometimes I demand more than my fair share.” stung a little when I read it.

    On Saturdays, I do a post including my favorite posts of the week. This one will be included for sure!

  3. Cool post! I can relate to all of your Sometimes. I really like “Sometimes I avoid speaking up by pretending to mind my own business”. Yup.

    You just keep getting awesomer and awesomer, Alex! 😉

  4. I love these lines : Sometimes I need to mind my own business. Sometimes I need to I speak up. Sometimes I avoid speaking up by pretending to mind my own business.

    Sometimes I smile so big it hurts. Sometimes I laugh because I hurt. Sometimes I laugh to hurt others.

    May use them as though provokers for my students 🙂

    1. ooh! your students are either going to learn to love me. or hate me.

      when I wrote that second paragraph, I just stared at it like UGH those last two sentences are so true and uncomfortable to see.

  5. Very relatable. I also found “Sometimes I don’t think that I deserve love. Sometimes I demand more than my fair share” particularly pertinent to my list of sometimes.

  6. Well said. I experience all your sometimes but at different times in my life, some of the sometimes are more present than others. Sometimes I drive myself crazy from all the sometimes. Then I think about how boring I would be and life would be if I was always the same.

  7. Sometimes I feel like giving up. Sometimes I dig deeper. Sometimes there’s nothing left to dig. And sometimes I’m surprised at how much further I can go.

    I really love this post, because we’re all there. Sometimes. And we all understand. Sometimes.

    Wonderful, wonderful post.

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