As some of you may have seen, I tweeted out Tuesday about a random woman berating me for leaving Ratchet dog in the car (this is the unabbreviated version also known as why I needed a blog):
I’m rounding up the kids to head to the car and take E to camp. Ratchet begs to come. I think: It’ll be a quick drop off and maybe we can go on a walk afterwards with N. (my thoughts are deep)
We all pile in, hit every stoplight and arrive late. I leave Ratchet in the car with all four windows down (high of 89 degrees that day. just giving you all the data in which to judge me).
I’m within eyesight the entire time. I’m gone less than five minutes.
Or I would’ve been if old-lady-with-a-chip-on-her-shoulder hadn’t showed up.
Internet troll with an ABC (in the communist state of Virginia liquor stores are state-run) name tag steps into the lobby of the camp: Do you know who owns the white car out there?
While holding my daughter and thinking that I must’ve left the lights on or did such a remarkable parking job that she came in to ask for pointers, I say: Me.
Internet troll (okay I’ll stop calling her that. don’t want to bias you): Your dog’s in the car.
Me: Yes. {I look out the window expecting to see something awful going on with Ratchet. Because I CAN SEE HIM from the lobby.}
Internet troll, I mean, Random woman: It’s illegal to leave him in your car.
Me {confused}: It’s not illegal, ma’am. I was just dropping my son off at camp {gesture about} and I’ve only been gone five minutes.
Random woman {getting angry}: Well, the car can get up to 115 degrees in less than five minutes.
Me: That’s why I left all the windows down, ma’am.
Random woman: Look how hard he’s panting!
Me: He’s a dog. Dogs pant. He pants all the time, ma’am.
Random woman starts to leave and says over her shoulder: Someone should lock YOU in a car.
Me {shocked. which is difficult to do.}: What makes you think you can speak to me that way?
Door slams shut on my sentence and she goes back to work.
A minute later, I walk to my car and she and her fellow worker stare out the window. At me. I sit in the car with it off for another five minutes. The car is still cooler than outside the entire time.
I finally turn on the car and drive past the ABC store.
And wave.
So I ask, should I have my dog poop in her store?
Because she STILL irritates me. And I have to go back to that parking lot at least five more times this month so there is plenty of chances for revenge.
My ideas:
- I’ve thought about having my dog in the car EVERY SINGLE TIME I’m in that parking lot.
- I’ve thought about bringing my dog into the ABC store.
- I’ve thought about punching her in the face.
- I’ve thought about writing her place of employment.
What have you thought about?
PS. In all seriousness, how long can I leave a dog in the car? What outside temperature precludes it? Google is NOT helpful. Also, I’m open to being wrong in this situation. Although I still maintain that coming into the lobby of my son’s camp and speaking to me like that in front of my daughter stopped being about the welfare of my dog long before she marched out of the building.
PPS. But mostly I’d like revenge ideas.
Answer that I wish I had included in my post because the revenge plan is brilliant. Walt writes: 89 are you kidding? That’s sweater weather for us out here in Nevada. We’re touchy about leaving living creatures in the car (kids,dogs,spouses) but it’s 115 with the windows down, the ac cranked and the car doing 80. AS for the Internet Troll…um Random Woman…ummm Nazi? Send a youngish friend in and call the coops when she doesn’t card them. Accuse her even if she does card them. No….wait…..send S in and have him ask her if she wants to be a Zombie. No…wait…..BEST REVENGE IDEA EVER ALERT!!!! Loose the cart equipped N in to the ABC store. Then Ali added: even BETTER idea. let E loose in the store and tell him to FIND the kid carts. about 30 seconds later send N in to look for the hummus!
Answer that I totally trust. Jennie writes: While I was in college I worked as a veterinary technician. I will never forget the day one of the veterinarians forgot he left his dog in the car. Temps were in the 80′s. All of a sudden he ran outside and then immediately came back in holding his lab in his arms sobbing. Pam, his dog, went through a horribly painful death and he new first hand what she must have gone through. I don’t think you’re case would have killed your dog, and I do think the lady over reacted. I think people are so passionate about the issue because it can cause so much harm in such a short amount of time and there are many people that just don’t know. As a rule for myself, I never leave my dog in car if the temps are in the 70′s or above. I can be such a space cadet at times and would hate to have been distracted and waited just too long. In Utah, it is illegal to leave your dog in your car during the summer. The cops will smash out your windows, take your dog, and write you a big ticket. Sorry you had to deal with the nasty lady. Wouldn’t it be nice if people could just talk to each other with respect rather than anger and contempt.
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I don’t think you were in the wrong. I personally wouldn’t do that because I wouldn’t trust my particular dog not to jump out a window, but my dog is still a puppy and not the brightest bulb in the marquee. I think UP UNTIL SHE GOT RUDE I would call this “being a good Samaritan.” Once she ascertained that the dog had an owner who was being mindful of the dog’s welfare is where she jumped the shark–if she’d just said “oh okay, I was worried and wanted to make sure the dog would be okay” then hey, that would’ve been okay. Getting rude, though? Totally uncalled for. Doing it in her work clothes? Just plain unprofessional on top of uncalled for. If I were you I think I’d write an indignant letter to her employer.
P.S. My dog pants AT ALL TIMES outside if it’s over 85 degrees because yeah, they do that.
That is it EXACTLY. Had she been doing the good Samaritan? I would’ve THANKED HER. But once I didn’t run off scream to my car to save my dog from NOTHING or didn’t cry about how I’m such a bad pet owner, she kinda freaked out. And I was SO done. Well, and also freaked out myself since she was kinda aggressive in her rudeness.
Real-life troll, definitely. I’m a nut about hot cars and dogs, but that sounds like nothing at all to me.
I like killing ‘em with kindness, myself. Be ULTRA sweet to her, but look for something to get her on! Maybe an ADA violation; most stores don’t leave enough space for wheelchairs, so you could point that out. Sweetly, of course, because that will be so surprising to her, she won’t know what to do.
I love killing with kindness. Man, it’s fun watching people squirm under all that nice crap. (And I feel like a better person too blahblahblah)
Maybe I should bring my dog in a wheelchair just to make the ADA violation point a clear one.
People get a little insane about dogs. You could probably have left your daughter in the car for five minutes and she wouldn’t have said anything. I’ll tell you, I have to leave the kids in the car with the air conditioner on or the windows down for a minute here or there, and I’m afraid the police are going to come and cart me off to jail after all of those stories about kids in cars that are horrifying.
My idea. Take the dog into her office with a leash and tell her you need someone to watch him for a few minutes while you drop your son off. Then hope he poops on her shoes.
Okay so I totally agree that had it been my kid, people would’ve thought it (maybe) but not said A WORD.
I have totally thought about leaving the dog with her next time. I just don’t know if I can handle interacting with her again.
You know what? I trust reasonable, logical, people to make informed choices. You don’t have to tell what the temperature was or what you did to make him comfortable, all you have to say is “I made sure he was comfortable” That’s it.
As for the woman, the way I handle things like that is to get very loud very quickly, they never expect it. But that moment is past.
Don’t you hate it when someone gets the drop on you and you want to rewind time so you can go back and do all things you have now though of?
Thanks for: “all you have to say is “I made sure he was comfortable””. And I KNOW how you feel about your doggy.
I probably could not have gotten away with yelling in the camp lobby. But had I not had my daughter in my arms, I would’ve TOTALLY taken this outside. And gotten LOUD. Or maybe pulled you up on the speaker phone ;)
ok, unfortunately I get really upset when people pick on my friends. Actually, I get angry. So, I have no idea what suggestions your readership made b/c I was so ready to tell you my great idea. first, we slit her tires, then we lock dog POOP in her car. If we can’t do that, I am willing to dress up as a dog, sit in you car, hang out the window and pant like there is no tomorrow towards the ABC store. (Side note: I am pretty sure I have done this before sans costume.) Think about it…
I LOVED this comment. In fact, your Plan B made me so happy that I tweeted it out. I would TOTALLY dress up like a dog and pant for you, too. Friends Forever baby.
We’ve gotten scolded by a random woman in a parking lot before for leaving Biscuit in the car when it was hot. It was super awkward and uncomfortable. We are way more cautious now, yes it’s much better for Biscuit and I think he’s glad, but we don’t want to get scolded by a stranger again either because that really sucked. As far as how the lady spoke to you in front of your children, sounds like you kept your cool and took the high road, a wonderful opportunity for showing the kids how to handle a jerk.
P.S. I read and highly enjoy all your blog posts and this is the first time I’ve commented, I think there’s a word for that but I can’t remember what it is.
Long time reader First time commenter? Or lurker? I’m not sure what the lingo is either but I’m glad that you commented!
Thanks for complimenting my parenting example. I am proud that at least acted calm. Even if I was shaking and angry on the inside. Because it really DOES suck.
And I’ve learned what I’m okay with when it comes to taking Ratchet with us. Which is great because next time it won’t feel so personal
I’m late to this party and you already got a ton of great comments. I’ll just sympathize on how much I hate those nosy goody-two-shoes who do not know anything about you or the circumstances and assume that you’re a total idiot.
So, yeah. I like the revenge ideas. Just don’t get arrested. THAT will give her another leg up.
Getting arrested is really low on my bucket list these days.
And yes, once I established that I was NOT an idiot, I’m pretty sure that if she was really a do-gooder, she would’ve BACKED OFF. She had an agenda that I was not happy to be on.
And you are never late to the party. Just fashionable.
I am also a long time reader/first time commenter (possibly a lurker, but that makes me sound so creepy.) I’m with Ann. The temp in a car with all the windows open cannot get much higher than the highest temp of the day. The random bitter internet troll woman should have minded her own business or at least been pleasant when she was minding yours.
yay for commenting!! and i don’t mind lurking either ;) creepy is the new cool.
and i couldn’t agree more with your last sentence.
Girl! This would have bothered me to know end! Even though I think people are crazy and “know” I’m right sometimes, it will STILL bother me because inside I am a people pleaser and can’t stand the idea of someone NOT liking me (How dare they not like ME?! I can NOT like THEM, but they HAVE to like ME.) Anyhoo, if it were a crime I’d be locked up multiple times. I do try to stick with really cool days in fall and winter, but one person’s really cool day could be too hot for another. You had the windows down, Ratchet stayed in the car, he was fine, you are a mom packin’ a kid,…she needs to have grace. End of story. Now you can do it again, or chose differently for next time. “And the more you know, the more you grow!” Sorry couldn’t resist.
I TOTALLY was bothered because I wanted this random person to think I’m a good dog owner. walking through THAT was the WORST!
PS. the second worst? i need to have grace too… ugh.
Yes! Totally meant YOU were the one that needed to have grace. She needs to have grace for YOU…or did you mean you needed to give HER grace. WHAT?! :o)
Oh, I know that you meant she needs to have grace around me, which I totally appreciated. I just realized that I also need to have grace towards her and her troll-ness. {sigh}
I would have done the same. The windows were down and you were 5 minutes. Some people just like to complain and exert authority they wish they really had…and I’d punch her in the face. That seems to be the option that would provide the most immediate gratification.
i like a woman who isn’t afraid to discuss the merits of a good punch in the face
Even if it was 90 degrees and your windows were rolled up and you’d put a humidifier in the car turned on full blast….it is not anyone’s right to talk to you like that. Even if you don’t have kids. Even if you are just on the street.
Asking what to do about the woman is a whole different question and, in my opinion, should NOT be tied together with: did I do right by my dog?
Because if you were an animal abuser (you’re not but let’s just say) how would her abusing you verbally make you change your ways? You’d take it out on the dog or the next kid or spouse you saw. At best she changed nothing, at worst, she could have been the trigger for someone else being abused.
I think that’s the only thing about this conversation that’s important. Just because she used the dog for an excuse to treat you that way does not make it okay for her to be that way. Because it WOULDN’T HAVE HELPED no matter WHAT the situation was she found herself berating you for.
When people act like that toward other humans they have no right to act shocked that people treat other people and animals poorly. If you can’t keep your own s*** together how dare you take that out on someone else in the name of animal rights or whatever.
I love this line: If you can’t keep your own s*** together how dare you take that out on someone else in the name of animal rights or whatever.
Because we are living examples first and foremost. Which is why I didn’t punch her in the face.
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