We turn skeletons into goddesses, and look to them as if they might teach us how not to need. – Anonymous
I point out the row of Cosmo and Vogue to my ten-month-old daughter and say: There is a whole series of magazines that teach us how we are not enough. How much we need to shrink. How much we need to show. How much we lack. There is an entire culture, which we pay to remind us how short we fall.
I don’t blame the magazines. I don’t blame those who buy them. And I don’t say this from some feminist hilltop.
I believed for a long time that I was five pounds away from happy. But I wasn’t. Five pounds, ten pounds, the numbers only made me more lonely and afraid.
At first, I stopped reading those magazine because I didn’t need the help. I can feel less than all on my own. Thanks anyway! After awhile the magazines stopped appealing to me. I wasn’t looking for the change they offered.
When I treat my body like a gift, when I am moving and feeding and honoring my body’s limitations and abilities, I find contentment. Joy. Connection.
I’m not at war with my body anymore. I don’t worship the magazines in search of better. I am, most of the time, free.
I hope that my daughter can be, too.
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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
i needed this this morning. you have no idea how much.
still….you think i'd know better by now.
We all forget sometimes… I'm glad that the post helped. I had been hesitant to share it at first but have gotten so much great feedback on it. Thanks for letting me know it helped you.
You,my dear, are an absolute angel.
Thank you…. for being exactly as you are.
XOXOXO
K-L
Yesterday I was climbing the stairs and thought, “Ugh, my thighs are rubbing together. I better reign it in a tad,” I AM FOUR AND A HALF MONTHS PREGNANT FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! For real! I STILL have an image I'm trying to attain for my PREGNANT self. Thanks for the nudge in the right direction. I need to be healthy and go with how my body carries and not be concerned about anyone else.
I was like that especially during my second pregnancy because I gained so more weight and was working out so much less. I had to constantly remind myself to LAY OFF. I had to do that around being tired as well. HELLO. CREATING ANOTHER LIFE HERE!?!
I was like that especially during my second pregnancy because I gained so more weight and was working out so much less. I had to constantly remind myself to LAY OFF. I had to do that around being tired as well. HELLO. CREATING ANOTHER LIFE HERE!?!
Twitter: guiltysquid
June 16, 2010 at 10:50 am
Time to repost this on the front page, Chica! We are starting a movement, you know.
This is a Very Big Deal.
I applaud your courage, Alex, and your willingness to share your story, so that others can relate. As a mom of 3 girls, this is very important to me, and as 2 of them are teens, I cannot applaud loudly enough for this:
>> I don’t worship the magazines in search of better. I am, most of the time, free.
I hope that my daughter can be, too.<<
Ditto. Agreed. Bravo. and YES!